Probably the best of all time:


"Lukens, you know why your email girlfriend left you? Because you gave her a virus!"

Quotes of the day:

"You happy your brother owns the Philadelphia Soul?"

"Luke, are you Anna Nicole Smith's baby's father?"

Student 1: "Aren't you too old for Valentine's Day?"

Me: "No comment."

Student 2: "He already emailed his gift, get off his back!"

Quote of the Day:

A student marks me on the arm with his pen, and I look at my arm right away to see if there's a mark.

The student responds: "What, you don't want any color on you?"